Thursday, March 16, 2006

I Hereby Lay Claim to the Title "Most Boringest Vacationer Ever"

Yes, I know boringest is not a word. I'm trying to add some excitement to my day by being creative with the English language.

And now, lest I lose you before I really have a chance to bore you to tears, let's review what I have done with my day:

1. Wake up.
2. Eat oatmeal.
3. Waste time reading things I've already read on the internet.
4. Grudgingly put on my running clothes and shoes.
5. Consider napping instead.
6. Run. (I ate too many nachos and other assorted grease-laden foods yesterday to just take a nap.)
7. Shower.
8. Complete long and involved process I call "getting ready," which includes an entire family of Proactiv products and lots of smoothing of my hair.
9. Waste time on the internet while embroidering. (Multi-tasking! So efficient!)
10. Leave the house.
11. Take some pictures of flowers and trees and my own shadow.
12. Drool over some appliqued pillows. Think to self, "I could totally do that," as if I'd even get around to it. Please. I might as well just cough up the forty dollars one of those suckers costs.
13. Seriously consider coughing up forty dollars to buy a throw pillow.
14. Think to self, in my own defense, "It's not unreasonable to spend forty dollars on a throw pillow if it has all those cute birdies [or kitties, depending on which pillow I was eyeing] on it. That's quality workmanship!"
15. Leave store, but not before being seriously tempted by several items featuring bunnies.
16. Proceed to Starbucks.
17. Order iced grande hazelnut percent no whip mocha. Employee looks confused, can't find the right cup, must be new. Or maybe no one who frequents this 'bucks gets anything so...high maintenance.
18. Drink iced mocha, complete three sudoku puzzles.
19. Discover that the water bottles I've been wanting are on clearance. Score!
20. Purchase water bottles, which are the same water bottles I could probably get at home.
21. Return to apartment.
22. Decide that the internet must know the incredibly intriguing details of my day.

What? What's that you're saying? I could have done all those things without having to travel 2000 miles across the U S of A?

Um, yeah. I KNOW.


Shepcat said...

I went all the way to Seattle to drink coffee and blog. You'll hear no criticism coming from my little corner of the 'net.

Enjoy the rest of your iced grande hazelnut vacation with my compliments.

cara said...

ok so i actually am an ex-green apron wearer and i have no idea what the percent in your drink order is? is that some fancy-ass thing they say in the mid-west?

and really, the whole point is that you're on vacation! and not so much what you do or don't do, in my opinion anyhoo.

marymuses said...

Thank you, Shepcat. I will enjoy it, I'm sure, especially if I can convince Holly to go have doughnuts for lunch today.

Cara, the percent refers to 2% milk. That's how the Starbucks "Make It Your Drink" manual told me to say it, so I assumed that their employees knew it as well. Has it been awhile since you wore the green apron? Maybe it's new(ish) lingo.

cara said...

ok, it'd been a little while since i worked there, but i was there when those little booklet thingys came out. i don't think i ever saw anyone use it though, so way to go.

as much as they try to make everything uniform in starbucks all around the world, if you ordered it that way in say, surrey, b.c., the baristas would be a bit lost. but that's ok. better confused than cleaning up after another crack whore in the bathroom. yes, i am speaking from experience.