Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Because I Lack Postal Addresses for These Recipients

Dear Circadian Rhythm,

Why can't we just get along? You're kind of killing me with the insomnia. Stop it already.

Yours until the day I die, not that I like it that way,
Mary

...

Dear Isabella,

Where have you been all my life? I hope you last pretty much forever.

Rainbows, hearts, and unicorns,
Mary

...

Dear applesauce,

If Jarod fails to show up at the altar, will you marry me?

Wishing I were kidding, but I'M NOT,
Mary

...

Dear laundry,

Why can't you just learn to wash yourself?

GEEZ,
Mary

...

Dear Trader Joe's,

Please restock the Organic High Fiber Os as soon as possible because I love that cereal and cannot live without it, much like I cannot live without creating run-on sentences. So crunchy! I know that I should probably be about eighty, what with all the love and adoration I throw at a cereal that plainly states in its name that it's full of the material that keeps folks "regular," but at least I haven't gotten into prune juice just yet. Help a girl out, won't you?

Your friend,
Mary

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