Thursday, July 22, 2010

It's Kind of Nice, Actually

I think a lot about body image. Now that I'm fixing to bring home a daughter, I think about it even more than I did before. I notice when I am using a Jillian Michaels video to work out, how much she mentions "problem" areas and what kind of body we all want, and it bothers me. The workouts themselves are wonderful, and I would be hard pressed to find something that would work me out as well that I could do in the small space afforded by my living room (and after I move a piece of furniture, at that). But the message that there is a certain body type that all women are aspiring to attain, well, I could do without that. I suppose it's my own fault for buying videos called "No More Trouble Zones" and "Banish Fat Boost Metabolism," but still. I challenge you to give me a good cardio video and a good strength training video without any of that kind of sentiment contained. As far as I know, such a thing does not exist, and it's probably because the focus continues to be on getting a perfect body as opposed to pursuing good health.

Something in the way I see myself has changed as of late, and I'm not sure exactly how it happened, but it's what makes all the "perfect" body talk so unbearable. I'm certainly not out of the woods, but the way I feel about my body--and beyond that about how I measure what makes my body "good"--has become kinder and gentler. For most of the summer, I've been unable to work out as often as I prefer, and yet I'm still somehow within the same eight pound range I've stayed within for the past twelve years. Could it be that this is simply the size I am when I am listening to what my body wants and needs and can do? I think so. Realizing that and accepting it as something that simply is, as opposed to something I should try desperately to change, has been freeing. I like my body just the way it is.

Weird.

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